


Seasons Change

by ready_to_kick_some_ass



Series: Adoption AU [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Angst, Family, Family Bonding, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Kid Jemma Simmons, Kid Leo Fitz, Parent Melinda May, Parent Phil Coulson, Pre-Relationship, adoption au, mama may
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 10:16:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16135178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ready_to_kick_some_ass/pseuds/ready_to_kick_some_ass
Summary: The seasons change and May's little family is growing closer.Things happen.Leo doesn't want to be called Leo anymore.Jemma wants to invite someone over. But her brother is scared of change.But when Daisy and her father, Phil Coulson, finally enter their life, it feels like it was supposed to happen.(Sequel to "Behind Closed Door" and "How To Find A Smile")





	Seasons Change

May’s little family is growing closer with every day.

She can feel it. She hopes her kids can too.

Routines are forming.  
They start to do trips every weekend.  
Sometimes, they visit zoos or parks. Or they do long walks through the nature.  
Usually they end the day with pizza and ice cream.  
It becomes a comforting ritual.  
May loves it to see the smile on Leo's face getting a little bit brighter with every of those days.

He deserves so much happiness ...  
May's glad when she can be a part in showing him, that the future isn't dark and hopeless.

Because it really gets better.  
  
Leo's speech improves slowly but constantly.  
He finally talks to his therapist and does his exercises.  
He practises with his word cards, trying to spell out even the long, difficult words.  
Sometimes May sees him in the garden, throwing a small ball against the fence, and catching it with a concentrated frown.  
The sight always makes her feel proud and warm.  
He's finally fighting back. After all he's been through, he's fighting back.  
He's so brave.  
And he already made great progress.

But there’s still the ever-lingering shadow in his eyes. There are still nightmares. Sometimes even wet bedsheets and tears. Hot chocolates, warm blankets and a Disney movie in the middle of the night because no one can fall asleep again.  
Most of the times, they manage to get through all this stuff together.

But sometimes, there are moments, when May feels desperate, almost helpless.

There was this moment, when he accidentally shattered a glass in the kitchen and immediately hid under the table, his whole body trembling in fear. “Sorry,” he was repeating over and over. “Sorry, sorry, sorry …”  
It took May almost an hour to convince him that nothing would happen to him. That no one was going to hurt him. That it was alright. That it was just a stupid glass.

There was another moment, when Jemma accidentally slammed the door to her room shut too loud and Fitz suddenly disappeared into his drawer for hours, whimpering every time May tried to open it, to coax him out.

In such moments, May feels a distressing mix of sadness, worry and burning rage.  
She saw the man who’s to blame for this.  
And she still sometimes thinks about how it would have felt like, to make him pay for everything ...

There are those bad moments, but after all, they are nothing against all the love and warmth their family is spending. They will be alright.  
  
  
Time passes.  
Almost a year goes by. The seasons change around them.  
It's autumn and the leaves are falling down, leaving colorful heaps on the ground.  
When it’s almost Halloween, May asks Fitz what he wants to dress up as. He stares at her for a moment. Then he starts to cry.  

May doesn’t ask.  
She’s used to it by now. A lot of things are connected to memories. She knows that from own experience.

She just takes him in her arms and holds him, letting him cry.  
The pain has to get out. It’s no use keeping it inside.  
Sometime, he manages to tell her, that he didn’t celebrate Halloween since his mother died.  
She used to dress up with him and go out to collect sweets.

“I m-m-miss her,” he mumbles.

“I know,” May says, stroking his hair. “I know …”

There's a moment of silence, only disturbed by Leo's last, quiet sobs, and the rain, that is steadily drumming against the windows.

“We don’t need to do anything at all at Halloween,” May says after a while. “We can just watch a movie and have popcorn and sweets. It’s up to you, alright?”

He nods, wiping his eyes.  
“Thanks … Thanks May.”

 

They end up watching some (mildly) scary animation movies, snuggling on the couch under their big fuzzy blanket. May in the middle balances the bowl with popcorn and sweets on her lap, while their children are picking from it.

May feels nice. Outside, there’s a storm anyway. So it’s extra comfy in the flat.

And when Leo’s head slowly starts to sink on her shoulder, she thinks it’s actually the best Halloween she ever had.

*

It’s a rainy Sunday in November, when Leo tells her that he doesn’t want to be called Leo anymore.

“Why?” May asks, mildly surprised. “Do you prefer Leopold?”

“No,” Fitz says, looking down at his feet.

“James?” She asks when he doesn’t say anything else.

But he shakes his head.  
“No. I … I think, I just, um, want to be Fitz.”

“You want to be called by your surname?” She asks, frowning.

He looks up at her.  
“Yes. It’s … it’s not, um … wrong. Not from … from back then.”  
His eyes beg her to understand.

And she does.  
She nods.  
“Okay. If you want me to call you Fitz, I’ll do that, alright? It is your name, your decision.”

“Thanks,” he says, sounding relieved. “Thanks, Melinda.”

She smiles at him.  
He doesn’t call her mum. He never does.  
Maybe he will sometime. Maybe he won’t.  
She doesn’t mind. She understands why it is more difficult for him than it was for Jemma.  
At least he went from “May” to “Melinda” now.  
  
She counts that as progress.

*

“Mum,” Jemma asks at dinner. “Can I invite someone over?”

May looks up surprised, just in time to see Fitz flinching, almost dropping the spoon he’s eating his pudding with.  
“Who?” May asks.

“A girl. She’s new in our class. Her name is Daisy. And you know what, she's adopted too,” Jemma explains, side-eying Fitz somewhat nervously.

May smiles.  
“Of course," she says, keeping an eye on Fitz, who tenses even more.

“Thanks," Jemma says. She smiles relieved.

“She isn’t your ... your friend,” Fitz says suddenly. His eyes narrow and he starts to chew on his lip nervously.

May frowns.  
She starts to understand what’s going on here.

Jemma glares at Fitz.  
“She _is_. She’s also your friend. She said so.”

Fitz shakes his head. His free hand clenches into a fist.    
“No, she isn’t. We just t-t-talked to her, once, Jemma. She’s just a classmate.”

“But she’s nice. And she’s always standing around alone in the breaks,” Jemma says, suddenly sounding sad. “We can be her friends. So she doesn’t have to feel lonely anymore.”

May feels a sudden wave of both affection and worry for her daughter, who always cares so much for other people. She just hopes it won’t hurt her someday.  

“New people are d-d-difficult,” Fitz mumbles, not looking at Jemma, who makes a face at him.

“Not always,” she tells him. “Sometimes they are fun. Sometimes ..."

“So _you_ says. You, who d-d-doesn’t stutter a-a-and is c-c-called a, a, weirdo,” he interrupts her, his stuttering more pronounced because of his obvious anger.

“No reason to not even _try_ to be nice to someone who is lonely. You were lonely too!” Jemma says. There are tears in her eyes now.

Fitz opens his mouth, but closes it again, when May clears her throat.  
“Hey,” she says. “Stop arguing, you two. If Jemma wants to invite someone over, it’s not up to you, to give her permission, Fitz. And …”

Before she can continue, Fitz stands up abruptly and leaves the room. May hears him quickly stumbling up the stairs. The door to his room slams shut. Loud.

Jemma looks like she’s close to crying now.  
“I’m just trying to be nice! And I was happy I could make a friend. It’s never easy for me and he knows that,” she says, wiping a strand of hair out of her face. “Why is he angry now?”

May sighs.  
“It’s a bit complicated, bumblebee. I think Fitz is scared that something could change, you know ..."

“But … me having a friend won’t change anything,” Jemma says, frowning. “Everything will be just like it is now. I will just have a friend. And she can be his friend too!"

“I know bumblebee. Let me talk to him, alright?”

“Okay, mum.”

*

“Hey,” May says, opening the door to Fitz’s room.

He’s sitting on his bed, staring into the void.  
But when he hears her voice, he looks up at her, a lost look in his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he says quickly. “I … I didn’t w-w-want to be, um … um …” He flaps his hand in distress.  
May waits patiently.  
She knows that finding the word for him would just stress him out even more.

“Rude!” He finally blurts out. “Didn’t want to be rude.”

May shakes her head.  
“It’s alright. I can see that something is bordering you. Talk to me. Don’t keep it in. Otherwise, I can’t help you. You know by now, that you can talk to me and Jemma about everything, don’t you?”

Fitz nods and sighs. He looks at his hands, which are playing with each other restlessly.  
“I don’t like, um, change,” he says softly. “It’s always … now, right now, everything’s okay. I think. Me and Jemma. You. I d-d-don’t need someone new.”

He looks up at her and she sees tears in his eyes.  
“What if … if Jemma l-l-likes her more than, um, me? I d-d-don’t want to l-l-lose her.”

May sits down on the bed beside him, laying a hand on his shoulder.  
“Listen. You don’t need to worry at all. We are a family. We always will be a family. Jemma is your sister. A friend won’t change anything. It won’t change how she’s feeling about you. She won’t leave you out. And maybe she’s right? Maybe you can be Daisy’s friend too. Sometimes, Fitz, you have to be brave. You have to try things that scare you. Otherwise, you will always step on the spot, you understand? I understand that you scared of change. Change can be really scary. But it doesn’t have to be. Not always.”

He looks at her for a moment. Then he nods carefully.  
“Okay. I … I’ll try.”

May smiles at him.  
“I’m glad. Now, don’t you want to come back to dinner? I think there’s still pudding left.”

He grins and wipes his eyes.  
“Okay. Thanks M … Melinda.”

He stands up and leaves the room.

May follows him, suddenly struggling to not feel disappointed.

She almost thought he would call her mum.

*

At the weekend, Daisy is brought by her father.

May opens the door and looks into blue eyes, that are surprisingly warm. When the man smiles, she immediately feels a hint of sympathy.

“Phillip Coulson,” he says, smiling at her. “Your daughter, Jemma, invited Daisy over.”

He nods down at the girl, that’s hiding behind him, holding on to his leg.  
Daisy is small for her age.  
Her brown eyes are wide open.  
She chews on the thumb of her free hand.

Another traumatized kid? May asks herself. The look in Daisy's eyes is sadly familiar.

She shakes the man’s hand.  
“Melinda May. And you must be Daisy,” she says softly to the girl, smiling.

Daisy nods carefully.

In this moment, Jemma appears beside May, waving at Daisy excitedly.  
“Hey Daisy! I'm so glad you're here. Do you want to come in?" She walks towards Daisy, offering her hand to her.

Daisy smiles, suddenly seeming less anxious. She takes Jemma’s hand and they disappear into the flat without another look back at their parents.

Daisy’s father grins.  
“Well. That was quick.”

May smiles at him.  
“I can drive her back home later, if that’s alright for you? You just have to give me the address.”

He nods and takes out a note. He writes the address on it and hands it over to May. Their fingers touch briefly, and they look at each other. May suddenly feels like this is an important moment. She swallows.

“See you later,” he says, smiling again.

“Yes,” she answers.

He walks to his car and she watches after him, frowning.

 

That’s how Phil Coulson enters her life.

*

Daisy’s visit is going more than well.

Jemma shows her the whole flat, involving her and Fitz’s room.  
When she opens the door to it, Fitz is laying on his bed, reading the new science book he bought from his pocket money.

He looks up and frowns.

“This is my brother Fitz,” Jemma says to Daisy. “You already know him from school.”

“Hello,” Daisy says, smiling carefully.

Fitz takes a deep breath.  
“Hello,” he replies.

Daisy looks around the room. Her eyes suddenly widen.  
“You have a pillow fort!” She says.

“Yes we have,” Fitz says proudly, raising his chin.

Jemma looks at him.

Fitz sees something in her eyes, something that’s both pleading and reassuring. He swallows and makes a decision.  
“Do you w-w-want to see it?” He asks Daisy.

Her whole face lits up.  
“I’d love to!”

And just like this, they really become friends.  
It just takes an hour in a pillow fort.  
Children are simple like this sometimes.

*

Daisy becomes a regular guest at their flat.

They learn a few things about her.  
Some are sad, others are nice.  
Sad is, that she was raised in orphanage – just like Jemma – because her parents died. Sad is, that she was in a few families, which didn’t always treat her well and always abandoned her again, like a pet they weren’t satisfied with. Sad is, that she was mocked and scolded for her quirks. She’s a bit hyperactive and bouncy. Jemma can’t understand why someone would abandon a child because of this and her and May have a long talk about it.  
Nice is, that Phil Coulson found Daisy just a year ago.  
And now things are much better.

Phil Coulson is great, Daisy says.  
And she’s right.

When he comes to pick his daughter up, he sometimes stays for a tea and talks to May. He also draws pictures of cats and dogs for Jemma – he can draw amazingly good – and a lot of monkeys for Fitz, who doesn’t always leaves his room, when he’s in the flat. But sometimes he does, because Phil Coulson – they call him Phil soon. Just Phil. – is nice and he senses it.

Jemma starts to notice some things while the time passes.  
She notices, that her mum is really happy when Phil is around. She smiles a lot, in a different way. She plays with her hair and sometimes, she stands at the window, looking after Phil and Daisy, when they go back home.

Jemma starts to notice and then she starts to understand.  
She talks with Fitz about it, hidden in their pillow fort, and Fitz understands too.

Jemma waits and watches.  
She starts to think.  
And in her mind she sees a picture, that makes her heart feel warm and her stomach flutter.

She shares it with Fitz, who is a bit doubtful, but says, he wouldn’t mind that much – probably.

So Jemma decides to act.

  
“Phil is nice,” she says almost casually one day, when she and May are cutting apples for their weekly cake and Fitz is rolling out dough. But only almost. She’s looking at May with a certain knowing expression in her hazel eyes.

May raises an eyebrow.  
“He is, yes,” she mumbles.   

Jemma hums.  
Then she says, “Mum. You said we’re going to make chocolate cake on Sunday. Maybe Daisy can come over? Together with Phil?”

“Together with Phil?” May echoes, smiling. “You think he likes chocolate cake?”

“Everyone l-l-likes chocolate cake,” Fitz says matter of factly, frowning as he looks at his hands, which are covered in dough and flour.

“Exactly,” Jemma nods emphatically, smiling brightly.

May sighs.  
“Okay. We can ask them.”

Jemma and Fitz look at each other, grinning.

*

The baking is fun. It goes quickly with four people and they laugh a lot, especially when Phil, who is a bit clumsy in the kitchen, manages to pour flour all over his sweater.

They spend the whole Sunday together and in the evening, when it’s already getting dark outside, Phil lingers at the door, a question on his lips.

May looks at him, waiting patiently. She senses he's going to say something.

Phil clears his throat.  
“I wanted to ask you something,” He finally states.  

May leans against the doorframe. She waits.

He scratches the back of his head.  
“Would you fancy a coffee sometime? With me?” He asks.  

May swallows.  
He’s asking her out, she realizes surprised.  
He’s really asking her out.  
And she already starts to think about all the things that could go wrong …

 “Yes,” she quickly says, before her mind can destroy this before it even began. Because her heart tells her she should agree. “Yes, I would fancy a coffee with you.”

“Great,” he says, sounding happy and relieved. “I’ll phone you.”

They look at each other, smiling.  
May is surprised at the sudden wave of warmth, that is overwhelming her.  
She watches him leave, carrying an already sleeping Daisy to the car.

When she turns around, her children are standing in front of her, both grinning, like they know something she doesn’t.  
She raises her eyebrows and shakes her head at them.  
In the corner of her eyes, she sees them high-fiving each other, and grins.  

*

There is more than just one coffee Melinda and Phil share.

She needs a while until she realizes, that she’s in love with him.  
First, it frightens her.  
Because … such things never worked out good for her.  
Never.

But then, she decides to let it happen.  
Because this time, it's different.  
She isn't working anymore. Her isn't violent anymore. She has a family and he and his daughter are already somehow a part of it.

Her kids love him.  
Even Fitz, who doesn’t trust new people easily, is surprisingly open when Phil's around and almost doesn’t stutter at all.

And there’s Daisy of course.  
A little ray of sunshine, who already hugs May and looks at her with warm, trusting eyes.  
  
Phil and Daisy.  
Melinda, Jemma and Fitz.

She feels like this could be something great.

So she lets it happen and hopes history won’t repeat itself.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a native speaker and always grateful for being corrected! I'm constantly trying to improve my English, so please don't hesitate to tell me about mistakes. <3
> 
> Visit me on tumblr: [ready-to-kick-some-ass](https://ready-to-kick-some-ass.tumblr.com/) :)


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